Episode Transcript
[00:00:00] Speaker A: Hola, Puerto Rico. Welcome to the Vault of Silliness, and thanks for joining us. Oh, and for those of you who listened on the late Google podcasts, thanks for seeking us out and finding us on one of the other platforms that host us throughout the interwebs. I've been swamped with other responsibilities, and that's why the vault has been locked for a couple of weeks. With that said, let's get to what you've been waiting for, a very funny, dumb birthday game from March 29, 1996 that has been aptly titled the HGPG DBG, the hungarian gypsy princess grandmother dumb birthday game. A real highlight here is listening to Norm at times lose it with laughter, and then we don't get just one tidbit of wisdom from Norm's HGPG, but four. And then one from hungarian gypsy John Major. And then the Lone Ranger and Tonto stopped by.
[00:01:00] Speaker B: Whew.
[00:01:00] Speaker A: This is packed full of stuff. The players, Mike Epstein producing and playing in studio, Jack Hart in traffic, Jenny from Plymouth, snoring Beauty, also known as Al and Waltham, and Terry from Newton. The birthdays Elle McPherson, Eileen Eckert, John Major, Eugene McCarthy, Phil Foster, Jennifer Capriotti, Marina Sirtis, and Eric Idle. Three dead birthdays Billy Carter, Sam Walton, Cy Young.
Episode 182, the HGPG DBG extols its way to your ears in three, two, and one.
[00:01:44] Speaker C: Or something. Or something like that. We have Jack Hyde, who I don't get a chance to talk to during the week very often.
[00:01:51] Speaker D: Hi.
[00:01:52] Speaker C: Hi. This is really an exciting moment for me. It may not mean anything to you, and you may forget about it in the morning and not even respect me then.
[00:01:59] Speaker D: Oh, no, I've got. I've got my. I've got my diary open to today's page so that when I'm done, I can jot down every bit of information, every bit of ribaldry that occurs these next 40 minutes or so.
[00:02:12] Speaker C: Oh, shut up.
As a matter of fact, we'll get a chance to do this several more times during the next week, but probably is on vacation for several more days.
[00:02:24] Speaker D: Is that right?
[00:02:24] Speaker C: And so you knew that. What do you mean? What do you make it sound like a news flash? Rip out the front page, folks. And as a result, the thing that I like about this is we'll be playing a lot of dumb birthday games. And what it means is I can get rid of a lot of the clutter in my house.
[00:02:44] Speaker D: I see.
[00:02:45] Speaker C: Yeah. I wonder if somebody would like a kind of rusted cake pad. I could give one of those away.
[00:02:53] Speaker D: I'd like a three legged table, if you have one.
[00:02:55] Speaker C: Okay. And I have a half a pound of slightly used cat litter that I think somebody could use.
It isn't totally clean and it isn't brand new, but at least it'll be cheaper than the kind you have to buy. I have a ten pound box of peanut brittle I'm anxious to give away also that's slightly rusted and has kind of. Ants have worked their way into it. I might give that away as a.
[00:03:21] Speaker D: Nice pet kind of a deal.
[00:03:22] Speaker C: But, you know, let me ask you, do you.
[00:03:25] Speaker D: Do you have any use for. Can you use a vintage jar of mayonnaise?
[00:03:29] Speaker C: A vintage. Now, what would a vintage jar of mayonnaise be? How would that be different than a regular jar of mayonnaise? And I sure hope you have a funny answer for this.
[00:03:41] Speaker D: Well, you know, of course, this one is from when I was a youngster.
[00:03:46] Speaker C: What does that mean exactly? Is it just the jar that's vintage, or do you have. Oh, no, no.
[00:03:50] Speaker D: It's chock full of very old mayonnaise.
[00:03:52] Speaker C: A very old kind of seedy, sour smelling mayonnaise.
[00:03:57] Speaker D: Well, no, it gets better as it ages, you see.
[00:03:59] Speaker C: Oh, mayonnaise is like that, isn't it? Yeah.
[00:04:01] Speaker D: You have to decant it.
[00:04:02] Speaker C: I didn't know that. I didn't know that. You must be a gourmet cook. No, I had no idea about that. Which. And of course, we have Mike Epstein. Hello. Our producer. Hello. Hello.
[00:04:14] Speaker E: Hi, there.
[00:04:15] Speaker C: And playing the game with us today.
[00:04:17] Speaker E: Yes, and this is indeed a treat, Norman, it's not often that I get to play the dumb birthday game. I mean, working during the week, as I do.
[00:04:25] Speaker C: I know you do. I know. And we don't get a chance to work together on this, and so this must be. I can tell it's thrilling because you've got that glow at the tip of your nose.
[00:04:35] Speaker E: No, I think that's from some of the whiskey I had during the break we had on the Bruins team.
[00:04:39] Speaker C: I don't blame you. I couldn't do this program sober, either.
I tried it once and it was just a total flop. I had pains in my stomach and there was nothing funny about anything. Anyway, let me introduce you to other members of our panel who maybe have been nipping a little bit, too. I certainly hope we have Jenny, who's in the town of Plymouth. Hi, Jenny.
[00:05:02] Speaker B: Hi, Norm. Any more ads?
[00:05:06] Speaker C: Streanax. Is that kind of to stretch your neck to a proper size?
[00:05:10] Speaker D: We just heard from Streanax only moments ago.
[00:05:12] Speaker C: Oh, I'm sorry. I beg your pardon. I see I'm going to have to listen to this program because a lot of times when I do really listen, I find it quite interesting. But sometimes my mind wanders.
My mind does.
[00:05:29] Speaker B: Oh, man.
[00:05:30] Speaker C: Okay. Anyway, how are you doing, Jenny? Join us. What are you doing up at this time of the morning? And I'm glad you are.
[00:05:35] Speaker B: Oh, I'm always up to listen to you, Norm.
[00:05:38] Speaker C: Oh, I love you. God, I love you. I want you so bad, Jenny.
[00:05:41] Speaker B: Curled up in bed with my radio and you.
[00:05:46] Speaker C: Okay. I'm going to introduce you to another couple of guys also. Okay.
One is Al, who is in Waltham.
Either Al is sleeping or has some kind of an asthmatic condition.
And I do have.
Al.
Al.
I have some prevental and some vansarol and some Theodore pills for that very reason.
Yes, he is falling asleep. Hello, Al.
[00:06:22] Speaker D: Geez, he's the fastest snorer I've ever heard.
[00:06:24] Speaker C: I'll see. Hold on a minute. Let me sing a little lullaby to Al.
Go to sleep, go to sleep the wind is in the crooked trees and it sings a song to you Al go to sleep, go to sleep doesn't he look like a little sweet little baby? A little cherub? Look at that sweet little smile on his face. His mouth is open, though. The other is kind of. It's a gape.
[00:06:55] Speaker D: All I can picture is the curtains, you know, sort of go in and go out.
[00:06:59] Speaker C: Yeah, that's right. He's rolling down to his feet.
[00:07:03] Speaker D: Rolling back up.
[00:07:04] Speaker C: That's right. Every time he inhales, the kitchen table tablecloth comes. Flies right up his nose.
[00:07:11] Speaker D: His pajamas are swelling out. Shrinking in, swelling out.
[00:07:17] Speaker C: Al, you look just so darn cute. You look so cute.
I wonder. I wonder, Jenny, if you'd care to kiss him on the top of his head while he's. While he looks so cute there, would you? Oh, that's nice. That's nice. I tell you. Okay, we won't bother you anymore, Al. Goodbye. Goodbye, Al. Goodbye, old pal.
Okay, we also have Terry. You newton? Hi, Terry.
[00:07:44] Speaker B: Hi, mom.
[00:07:45] Speaker C: Oh, it's a woman.
[00:07:46] Speaker B: Poor Al.
[00:07:48] Speaker C: Poor Al. And on. You know what's awful is he's. The photo's gonna be off. Well, of course, Al was around.
[00:07:54] Speaker E: That'll wake him up, though. If that thing starts screaming in his ear, that's gonna wake up.
[00:07:58] Speaker C: Well, how's he gonna hear it?
[00:07:59] Speaker D: Through that snorkin.
[00:08:00] Speaker C: Yeah. Yes, ma'am. Yes, ma'am.
[00:08:02] Speaker B: I know what will wake him up.
[00:08:04] Speaker C: Send him some strengths I never thought of. That, you know, it's too late now. Cause I already hung up on him. But he. The thing, sometimes when that happens to somebody who's calling outside the area, I worry because they'll wake up about 3 hours later and they'll realize they had a huge telephone bill, as the phone is kind of dangling. But he called from Waltham, so I don't think it's that bad.
[00:08:28] Speaker E: You have too kind of a heart, Norman.
[00:08:30] Speaker C: I care about people. I've always loved people. It's been a curse.
Sometimes people have taken advantage of me as a result of that. But I don't care if I can go through life.
I'm sorry. I think I'm making a speech. I was thinking of my great. My hungarian gypsy princess grandmother, who had a. She had a nice thing to say about that. She said, normal, if you can go through life, show me a man who goes through life helping people, lifting them up when they're destitute, picking them up and giving them a second chance. If you could show me a person like that, I will show you a rusted bumper.
Yeah, that was one of the sayings. That was. I have a whole. One of these days I'm going to publisher collected sayings in a book, and we're going to send them out as maybe one of the dumb birthday game prizes. Or perhaps I can make a quick buck by selling them in the bookstores.
[00:09:29] Speaker D: Well, you might even make two.
[00:09:31] Speaker C: Listen, Barnes and nobles has been nipping at my toes.
Wow, you've been nipping too long. Would you like. You bet I have. I'm never doing this program sober. You kidding me?
Anyway.
[00:09:48] Speaker B: Hi, Jack.
[00:09:49] Speaker C: Hello.
[00:09:50] Speaker B: How are you?
[00:09:51] Speaker D: I'm well, and you? Fine, oh, thank you.
[00:09:55] Speaker B: Beautiful, incredible voice.
[00:09:58] Speaker C: As my hungarian gypsy princess grandmother used to say, show me a woman who cares about a man enough to ask about his health and is willing to make life a little bit more pleasant for him. Show me that kind of a man I know, and I'll show you a rusted walnut. She was on a rusted kick that day, as I recall.
[00:10:17] Speaker E: I guess so, yeah.
[00:10:18] Speaker C: Okay, let's see. We all ready to play the birthday game, boys and girls?
Hold on a minute. I think Bob Rawley is heading in the hall now. He says, I can't trust that guy with this program of mine.
[00:10:34] Speaker B: Yes, I don't want any junk from your house. I want a key ring.
[00:10:39] Speaker C: No, you get a key ring. That's the only good thing you get. You get a strength keepers keyring. Anybody who wins does get that.
[00:10:46] Speaker B: Okay?
[00:10:47] Speaker C: Okay. Today is the birthday of Ellie McPherson.
[00:10:50] Speaker B: Who the heck is he?
[00:10:51] Speaker E: Elle Macpherson.
[00:10:53] Speaker C: Oh, l just l, yes. Oh. Elle Macpherson. Actress, supermodel, beautiful lady. I don't know what she does besides looking beautiful.
[00:11:02] Speaker E: And who cares what she does besides looking good?
[00:11:04] Speaker C: She frequent Sports Illustrated swimsuit suit issues?
[00:11:08] Speaker E: Yes, she does.
[00:11:09] Speaker C: And she appeared in the film sirens. Anybody see that? Ever hear of it?
[00:11:14] Speaker D: Sirens? Was it about an ambulance? Ambulance chasing?
[00:11:17] Speaker C: Attorney?
[00:11:17] Speaker E: I have a feeling it wasn't.
[00:11:19] Speaker C: Yeah, I have a feeling it wasn't. I had a feeling it was men. Women. Women luring men. Yes. My hungarian gypsy prince's grandmother would say, show me a woman who lures men to their doom, who cares not for their, for their any esteem or for their families, but lures them into a life of sin and crime. Show me that kind of a woman right here, and I'll show you a green beach ball.
Okay. Ellie McPherson. Jenny. How old?
[00:11:52] Speaker E: Elle Macpherson.
[00:11:53] Speaker C: Oh, I'm sorry, Elle McPherson. I'm sure somebody calls her Ellie.
[00:11:56] Speaker B: 25.
[00:11:58] Speaker C: 25 for Elle Macpherson.
[00:12:00] Speaker B: Oh, she took my number.
She's from Australia.
[00:12:06] Speaker C: Let's see. She is.
It doesn't say. I don't have that information here. Isn't that interesting? Hold on a minute. I have another source.
[00:12:17] Speaker E: I thought she came from Fargo, North Dakota or something.
[00:12:21] Speaker C: She met Fargo, North Dakota. That may be. It's not in this one. However, I have many sources, and I'm gonna look up another source.
Yeah, this is another source. March 29. Let's see. Let us just see. Ellie McPherson.
Ellie? Elle. I'm sorry. Elle McPherson. No, she doesn't seem to be a theater source at all, so I don't know where she's from. What do you think, Al? How old? Oh, no. Al, I'm sorry. Al is asleep.
[00:12:51] Speaker E: That's right.
[00:12:52] Speaker C: Let's cross him up.
[00:12:56] Speaker D: I was answering for him.
[00:12:58] Speaker C: Okay. Terry, what do you think? How old is Elle McPherson?
[00:13:02] Speaker B: 23.
[00:13:04] Speaker C: 23, okay. And, Mike, what do you think?
[00:13:07] Speaker E: I think she's 29.
[00:13:10] Speaker C: 29.
[00:13:11] Speaker E: She's been doing these covers for a while. I think it's starting to catch up.
[00:13:15] Speaker C: In fact, I've detected the very beginnings, as I recall, of varicose veins.
Look closely at her picture.
[00:13:24] Speaker E: You say it isn't so? Non.
[00:13:25] Speaker C: Well, I don't know. I don't know. I happen to be a doctor, and I notice those things.
[00:13:30] Speaker D: Yeah, they tried to mask it as a little tattoo of a roadmap.
[00:13:34] Speaker C: That's right. That's exactly right. Exactly right. So how old do you think she is, Jack?
[00:13:39] Speaker D: Oh.
[00:13:41] Speaker C: Hmm. 28. 28. Okay. Ellen, McPherson actually is 32. Oh, my goodness. Oh, a lot older than you say, Mike. Mike came the closest at 29.
[00:13:53] Speaker E: Thank goodness.
[00:13:54] Speaker C: Yeah. Okay. How about Eileen Heckard, the actress?
[00:13:59] Speaker E: Is she a supermodel?
[00:14:01] Speaker C: No, she's not. She could be. She. I think she's a nice looking lady.
[00:14:04] Speaker E: Well, there you go.
[00:14:05] Speaker C: Although a little of it beyond the stage where you'd expect her to model. She's from Columbus, Ohio. Acted mainly on the stage. Appeared in the bad seed. She's been in a number of other things, too. Was she in the Goldie Hawn movie Private Benjamin? Was that Eileen Heckert? No, no, that was not Eileen Heckett.
[00:14:26] Speaker D: Eileen Heggart. She does have kind of a scratchy kind of a voice. She might have been in the movie cactus flower with Goldie Hawn, however.
And she shows up in sitcoms and things, usually playing like. Like somebody's mother and such.
[00:14:43] Speaker C: Was she in the Mary Tyler Moore show? Maybe as a war correspondent? Who. Yes, Grant. Their Lou Grant took a fancy, too.
[00:14:54] Speaker D: Yes, she. I think she played Mary's aunt.
[00:14:57] Speaker C: That's right. Yeah, that was Eileen Heckard. You know what the sick thing is?
[00:15:01] Speaker E: I know exactly what episode you're talking about.
[00:15:04] Speaker C: Do you?
[00:15:04] Speaker E: Yes, I do.
[00:15:05] Speaker C: Well. Cause I can lip sync. I can lip sync every one of the Mary Tyler Moore shows. I've seen them 8 million times, and I love them.
[00:15:13] Speaker D: Let's get a rousing rendition of the Mary Tyler Moore theme going right amongst us.
[00:15:17] Speaker C: Hope you mean it.
That was a line from Ted Baxter. Oh, no. I interviewed him once.
[00:15:23] Speaker D: Cause he.
[00:15:24] Speaker C: There's a line that's on there every now and then. He throws that in. I interviewed him once after the show ended, and he was doing a play up in the. Up Beverly at the, you know, whatever that is.
[00:15:35] Speaker E: The north Shore music circuit.
[00:15:37] Speaker C: Music circuit. He was staying at King's Grant, the motel up there. And I went up there with a tape recorder to interview him, and he was really charming. I loved him. I forget the name of the play he was in. He played the part of a father of a couple of daughters or something. Anyway, as I left him, I said, it's just been a pleasure. I loved that show, and I loved your role on it, and you're very special, and I thank you. And as I started walking across the lobby, I heard this voice say, I hope you mean it. He yelled across the lobby. I thought. I thought that was kind of funny. He was a good guy. Anyway, we're talking not about him, you understand. We're talking about Eileen Heckard. What do you think Jack?
[00:16:17] Speaker D: Eileen Heckard.
[00:16:19] Speaker C: Eileen Heckard. Yes.
[00:16:21] Speaker D: Let's see. I'm trying to think. When was the movie the bad seed that had to go to about 55?
[00:16:26] Speaker C: Bad scene.
[00:16:27] Speaker E: Yeah.
[00:16:28] Speaker C: I don't know. I don't have that information.
[00:16:30] Speaker D: Uh, so that would be about 40 years ago. And she was probably in her mid to late thirties then. I'm gonna say she's 81.
[00:16:41] Speaker C: 81, okay. And, Mike, what do you think just.
[00:16:45] Speaker E: Remembering her from that episode on the Mary Tyler Moore show? I don't remember her being.
Well, that was, what, 20 years ago?
[00:16:51] Speaker C: That show ended about 1977. I don't know, the late seventies.
[00:16:57] Speaker E: Okay, doing the math, um.
[00:17:03] Speaker B: I'm gonna.
[00:17:04] Speaker E: Say that she's arousing 76.
[00:17:08] Speaker D: Oh, that's the spirit.
[00:17:09] Speaker E: Thank you.
[00:17:10] Speaker C: Yeah, man. He said arousing too, which gets me all excited.
All I can think of is those impotent pills.
I'm sorry. I think I'm getting a little outrageous. But I like to be outrageous. Heaven help me. Anyway, Terry, what do you think?
[00:17:28] Speaker B: Seven? Seven.
[00:17:30] Speaker C: Okay. And Jenny?
Jenny says 74. 77 is correct. Did you know that, Terry?
[00:17:38] Speaker B: Yes, I did.
[00:17:39] Speaker C: Oh, you knew her age. Okay, how did you.
Oh, you read about it. Okay, well, you hit it right on the button and you remember it.
[00:17:48] Speaker B: Thank you.
[00:17:49] Speaker C: You're okay. How about Prime Minister of England, John Major?
John Major. The prime minister of England. Today is his birthday.
March 29.
Let's see. We'll start with you, Mike. What do you think? Do you have any idea how old he would be?
[00:18:06] Speaker E: Thank you. I have no idea.
[00:18:08] Speaker C: No idea.
[00:18:10] Speaker E: I see him on the tube every now and again when they show, like on C SPAN late on Sunday nights, they show the english parliament, and then they, for some reason over there, they.
[00:18:20] Speaker C: Yell a heck of a notice that they do. They're very rude.
[00:18:24] Speaker E: Oh, but it makes a great television.
[00:18:26] Speaker C: Excuse me, Prime Minister. How could you make that statement? When your fly is open? They say almost anything like that. That's totally disrespectful. It's crazy. As John Major would say. Perhaps. Perhaps if I give you an impression of him in one of his statements, you might be able to guess his age.
Show me a man who has been to Eton and graduated with high honors, and I'll show you a pink beret.
That's exactly my taste of him. That's exactly what he would say.
[00:18:58] Speaker E: All right. Based on that and that alone, I will say.
[00:19:06] Speaker C: I'm glad somebody. 5454-5054 sometimes I'm glad my mother still isn't around, because she'd be so ashamed of being Norman. Where do you get that probably from your father.
Jenny, how old do you think Prime Minister John Major is?
[00:19:27] Speaker B: I'd say 63.
[00:19:31] Speaker C: 63. You're going to say that in a positive way? Without a question. Okay, 63. All right. And let's see. Terry, what do you think?
[00:19:42] Speaker B: 73.
[00:19:44] Speaker C: 73, okay, Jack.
[00:19:48] Speaker D: Oh, let's see. He looks like he could be, like, older than he looks.
[00:19:54] Speaker E: Yeah.
[00:19:56] Speaker C: I think. I think. I think english people with their accents always sound, don't you think? Older than they. Oh, even. They sound older than they are. Even little kids, when they. Children. I'd like a tomato.
I like it. Tomato and a bunch of a speedy gears.
I'm only twelve years old, but I talk mature like this.
[00:20:20] Speaker D: But I would like tea.
[00:20:21] Speaker C: Yes. I'd come to America, to Everett, where you grew up, Mister Nathan. But I'm afraid they would smash my head into the sidewalk on somebody talking like this. You know.
[00:20:35] Speaker D: Who'S the. Any young man was actually born in England. And I often thought, how would comedy today differ if he had stayed there? Would his bit be something like, do be so good as to take my wife.
[00:20:49] Speaker C: Thank you.
He was.
They dedicated. When he. On his 90th birthday a couple of weeks ago, they dedicated it a street off of Times Square to him. And he said he would. He had. I don't know whether he'd fallen or something. He had hurt himself. But he came out in a wheelchair and he said, take my wheelchair, please. I don't know, I just. He was a bright and character. These old. These old poops, they're still funny and they don't take themselves too seriously. Please. You know what I'm saying? John. That's John Major. Ah, yes. Your name is John, isn't it? John Hart.
[00:21:27] Speaker D: My name is John, yes. And I always get flushed when I hear that.
[00:21:34] Speaker C: How old would you say John Major would be?
[00:21:38] Speaker D: Oh, let's see.
[00:21:39] Speaker C: He would be.
How many candles would there be on his cake? I would say a three score. Three score. That'd be 2040. 60. 60, yeah. That's what gets 60. 60. I would say 60. He would be 60. You wouldn't be 59. You would be 60.
We're having a good time. Why don't you join us? Okay, John. Prime Minister job. Major is actually 53.
[00:22:12] Speaker B: Oh, God.
[00:22:13] Speaker C: Mike said 54, so he's the close. Mike has got two out of two out of three. Two out of three so far.
[00:22:21] Speaker B: Ben, Mike, home.
[00:22:22] Speaker C: Goodbye. And Terry's got one. Okay, we're going to go back to the election of 1968. When did he do that? We'd say, oh, grandmother would say, show me a man who cares for his family, who loves his children and his wife, and looks out for their best wishes. And I'll show you a ripe nectarine.
You think about that, man. There's a lot of meaning there. So I wouldn't just laugh at it. And see, that is. That's heavy stuff.
[00:22:57] Speaker D: And of course, you know, it's in a tangerine. Plenty of pits.
[00:23:01] Speaker C: My hungarian gypsy princess grand. No, she wouldn't have said that. That was. She'd say, no, no, she wouldn't have liked that. Oh, no, no. She was deeper than that. Oh.
But of course, she was also a.
[00:23:15] Speaker D: Traffic reporter one time.
[00:23:19] Speaker C: Did you know that?
[00:23:20] Speaker D: We are. Is that right?
[00:23:21] Speaker C: Oh, yeah. She was a traffic. You know, all the people who started out as traffic reporters here at WBZ and went on to other things because that's why we have great hope for you, Jack.
[00:23:31] Speaker D: Oh, well, thank you very much.
[00:23:32] Speaker C: Yeah. Michelle Pfeiffer started out as a traffic.
[00:23:35] Speaker D: As a traffic reporter.
[00:23:36] Speaker C: You, in fact, she and Sophia Lorenzo, both that were kind of co traffic reporters on the same ship.
[00:23:44] Speaker D: It was sort of an international satellite feed. I understand. Sophia Loren from Italy reporting traffic around Rome.
[00:23:52] Speaker C: No, it had nothing to do with that. She was right where you are now. You reported traffic here. Don't try to make more of it than really exists. Do you understand what I'm saying to you, kid? Yes. Okay. Okay. Gene, we were talking about Eugene McCarthy. He was a traffic reporter, was he? Yeah, before he became a senator and a presidential candidate out of Minnesota. Good for him. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Things came along well with him. A lot of people like that.
[00:24:20] Speaker D: He still has his traffic reporters uniform, I understand.
[00:24:22] Speaker C: That's right. You.
Gene? Gene? No, Newt Gingrich. He was a traffic reporter. I heard you were at WBC. Yeah, he got. He only wanted to report stuff on the right side of the highways, left.
[00:24:37] Speaker D: Lane breakdowns never got reported.
[00:24:39] Speaker C: That's right. Yeah, that's right. Pull over to the right. That's the only place that will get the police out. Otherwise you're a dead duck if you pull to the left.
[00:24:48] Speaker D: Getting off at Route 24 from Route 128. Couldn't do it.
[00:24:52] Speaker C: Okay. Okay. Eugene McCarthy, anyway, he ran for president in 1990 on an anti Vietnam program, 1968. Well, I'm giving you dates now so that you can get an idea of his age. And anyway, he ran on an anti Vietnam program. He was the senator at the time from Minnesota, and eventually kind of got knocked out by Robert Kennedy, who was assassinated that same year, right during. As the results were coming in on the California, the primary. That all happened in 68. So does that help you identify Eugene McCarthy and mentioning how old you think he is?
Yeah, let's start with. Let's see. We'll start with Terry, what do you think, Terry?
[00:25:45] Speaker B: I would say 78.
[00:25:49] Speaker C: 78. You giggle when you said that. Is that a funny age or.
[00:25:52] Speaker B: No, no, I've just taken a wild guess.
[00:25:57] Speaker C: Okay, Jenny, what do you think?
[00:26:00] Speaker B: I think 76.
[00:26:03] Speaker D: That's the spirit.
[00:26:06] Speaker C: Sound like we're all in some religious service. That's the spirit.
That's the spirit.
Okay, Jack, what do you think?
[00:26:22] Speaker D: Oh, let's see. 81.
[00:26:26] Speaker C: 81, okay. And Mike.
[00:26:29] Speaker B: Oh.
[00:26:31] Speaker E: Hmm.
[00:26:32] Speaker C: And of course, remember Mike Leeds?
[00:26:35] Speaker E: I was gonna say 76, believe it or not, because that just seemed to fit.
[00:26:40] Speaker C: But you don't want to say, you.
[00:26:42] Speaker E: Know, I just don't want to.
[00:26:44] Speaker C: Okay.
[00:26:45] Speaker E: I'm gonna say 77.
[00:26:46] Speaker C: 77, okay. Actually, he's 80. Oh, I believe Jack. Jack said 80. Said 81. Nobody said 79. So Jack has got that one.
Okay. Okay, Jack. Okay, maybe.
Okay. Phil Foster. You know Phil Foster. Oh, yeah, the actor comedian.
[00:27:10] Speaker D: Mister Defazio.
[00:27:11] Speaker C: That's right. Frank Defazio, Laverne's father. Laverne and Shirley also made a comedy record in the fifties at which I used to play about a Brooklyn baseball fan.
Anyway, fool, I don't. Haven't seen him lately, but how old do you think he would be? Phil Foster? Yeah, Mike, what do you think?
[00:27:32] Speaker E: I just saw him.
[00:27:32] Speaker B: Wasn't.
[00:27:33] Speaker E: I think he was on the Laverne and Shirley reunion extravaganza they had back on the summer.
[00:27:37] Speaker D: The reunion. Extravagant.
[00:27:40] Speaker E: They had some kind of a retrospective of the show. It's kind of lame, but the heck there was nothing else on, you know.
[00:27:50] Speaker C: That'S a ring. Not exactly a ringing endorsement of the show.
[00:27:54] Speaker E: I was never a huge fan of the show anyway.
[00:27:56] Speaker D: Well, the show was good when it started.
[00:27:58] Speaker E: Yeah, when it started, but after about nine or ten seasons, whatever it was, it just started to kind of wear on.
[00:28:03] Speaker D: Vernon Shirley were no longer in high school. Yeah, precisely.
[00:28:07] Speaker C: What do they do?
[00:28:08] Speaker E: They went out to California after the brewery closed or some ridiculous thing like that.
[00:28:12] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:28:12] Speaker D: And then they moved to the head to like 1983 or something like within a season.
[00:28:18] Speaker E: I didn't understand why they did that. But of course, I don't make programming decisions at ABC, do I?
[00:28:23] Speaker C: Just here, just here at WBC.
[00:28:25] Speaker E: Yeah.
I'm gonna say that this guy, what was his name again?
[00:28:30] Speaker C: Phil Foster.
[00:28:33] Speaker E: 71.
[00:28:35] Speaker C: That's right. He had, what, a Brooklyn accent? Is that a Brooklyn accent? Uh, yeah, yeah.
[00:28:39] Speaker D: He almost sounded like a gruff Gary Marshall.
[00:28:43] Speaker C: A gruff Gary Marshall, yes, I guess that's true. What do you. How old do you think he is, Jack?
[00:28:51] Speaker D: Oh, he's gotta be.
Matter of fact, Gary Marshall's book, wake me when it's funny, was about when Gary Marshall used to write for Phil Foster. He and Gary Marshall, he had a writing partner. Phil Foster would go in and take a nap and come back and say.
[00:29:08] Speaker C: Wake me when it's funny.
[00:29:12] Speaker D: But I would have to say that he is 80.
[00:29:18] Speaker C: Okay. He is 80. And, Terry, what do you think Phil Foster is?
[00:29:23] Speaker B: 79.
[00:29:25] Speaker C: All right. And Jenny?
[00:29:28] Speaker B: 84.
[00:29:29] Speaker C: 84.
84 is the closest. Oh, my. Yeah, he's 83. 83.
Yeah, he's 80. Very good. So we now have one win apiece from Jenny, Terry and Jack. However, Mike has two, so still leads. Leads that way.
[00:29:51] Speaker E: Barely hanging on by my thumbnails.
[00:29:53] Speaker D: Let me get my hanky so I can mop my brow.
[00:29:56] Speaker C: Well, this is a tight contest. The squeeze is in. This is really exciting stuff. Today is also the birthday of some dead people whose ages we won't guess. No, because we don't guess dead people.
[00:30:10] Speaker E: No, we don't.
[00:30:10] Speaker C: Billy Carter and Sam Walton, who founded Walmart, and Cy Young, the baseball player who's award named after this is a great baseball pitcher.
Yes, sir. Okay, Jennifer, hold on just a minute here while I look and see who I'm talking about here.
This is an athlete, Jennifer Capriotti, tennis player.
Is he a tennis. Tennis player? Oh, here. Yeah, a former tennis player. It says, don't let that fool you because she's quite young.
She's from Saddlebrook, Florida. She won the gold medal at the 1992 Olympics in Barcelona, Spain, by beating a.
Oh, that was so nice. By beating Steffi Graff. She retired after being busted with marijuana twice.
Oh, that wasn't too nice.
Okay, Jeff, Jennifer Capriotti, what do you think? Jenny, is your name Jennifer your full name or is it Jenny?
[00:31:24] Speaker B: Jeanette. Without an a.
Jeanette without a name.
[00:31:28] Speaker C: Without a name.
[00:31:29] Speaker D: Without a name.
[00:31:31] Speaker C: How do you. Honey. J e n e t t e m m e t t e. Okay, well, Jeanette is. Yeah, Jeanette is a pretty name.
[00:31:40] Speaker B: Yeah.
Let's see. I say she's 20.
25.
[00:31:49] Speaker C: 25. Okay. And Terry, 27. Terry says 27.
[00:31:55] Speaker E: Mike, I'm trying to remember how old she was when she got busted.
Oh, not really. I just get lucky sometimes. Um, isn't she, like on the. Some kind of a comeback or something? Isn't she playing again?
[00:32:17] Speaker C: I don't know. Maybe because this written about two years.
[00:32:20] Speaker E: Ago, I could have sworn I heard her name connected with some tournament or other. But be that as it may, I'm going to take a stab at 2024 24.
[00:32:35] Speaker C: Okay. And what would you take a stab at, Jack?
[00:32:38] Speaker D: What would I take a stab at?
[00:32:40] Speaker C: That's what I'm asking. What would you take a stab at, Jack?
[00:32:47] Speaker D: 23.
[00:32:49] Speaker C: 23. And you came a little closer and just nosed out, Mike. Oh, yeah. Cause she's 20, just 20 years old today. Isn't that a sad to be out of it like that? Unless she is making a comeback.
[00:33:03] Speaker E: I thought she was.
[00:33:04] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:33:04] Speaker D: Maybe she was sick of playing tennis in the first place.
[00:33:08] Speaker C: You know, we never thought of that. You're a man with soul and a heart and a feeling for people.
[00:33:14] Speaker D: Yes.
[00:33:15] Speaker C: Who really are some. That means you and Mike, they both have two of peace. Yeah.
We can't we get to the bottom of the list here with people that you may or may not have heard of. For example.
[00:33:27] Speaker B: Come on, Terry, get going.
[00:33:29] Speaker C: Yeah. Marina. Yeah. Marina Sirtis. Oh, yeah. You know how she played Deanna Troy? Is it a trois?
[00:33:38] Speaker D: Troy.
[00:33:39] Speaker C: Troy, the next generation. That's right. Bumbling little arena Certes.
Yeah. It's kind of funny because she's heard of you.
Oh, yes. Oh, yes.
Terry, what do you think? 30. 30 for Marina Sirtis.
Okay. And Jack, what do you think?
[00:34:05] Speaker D: Oh, let me think. She was folding sweaters at the gap when she got that part.
[00:34:09] Speaker C: Oh, is that right?
[00:34:11] Speaker D: Yeah, yeah, let me think.
The show was on for seven years. It's been off for a year, slowed up and eight years ago. And how old would she have been? Let's say she was 26.
I'll say she's 35.
[00:34:31] Speaker C: I love the way you sing out the facts like that. It's really nice. That's really nice.
Jenny, what do you think? How old do you think Marina Certis is?
[00:34:42] Speaker B: How about 31?
[00:34:43] Speaker C: How about 31? Okay. And Mike. Yes, yes, yes, yes.
[00:34:51] Speaker E: And I'm going to say that she is 33.
[00:35:01] Speaker B: 33.
[00:35:02] Speaker C: 33, okay. Incidentally, when you're reporting the traffic report in the next ten minutes or so, Jack, you might mention the traffic jam that's in front of the WBZ studios, because we do have that big scoreboard out there. And as people guess ages, it goes up on the board. A lot of people slow down their cars.
[00:35:24] Speaker D: That's what that screeching noise is in the background.
[00:35:26] Speaker C: Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I don't know why they don't just turn their radios on and hear it this way. But I guess they like to see the way they compile a lot of people stop and they jot these things down. A lot of people listening.
This is always the heartwarming stuff. A lot of people write down the names of people who compete in the ages, they guess and then the real ages. And they keep scrapbooks full of this stuff. Sure. And they paste in pictures of the people we're talking about.
[00:35:57] Speaker E: Kind of like when you go to the ballpark and you buy the scorebook and you keep track of.
[00:36:01] Speaker C: Yeah, that's right. That's right. We ought to tell these folks here at WBZ because we have the WBZ sales shop here. Yeah, the gift and bookshop.
[00:36:13] Speaker E: Right.
[00:36:14] Speaker C: They have actually official WBZ dumb birthday game cards so you can actually register them right into your own card. And we do sell the rule book that's a little more expensive because it's now up to 1220 pages.
[00:36:27] Speaker D: Well, you know, the scoreboard you have out in front. You know, one of the things that I understand is a draw to that is this is just such a fast moving game as people like to see the.
[00:36:38] Speaker C: See that?
[00:36:38] Speaker D: All the lights whirr.
[00:36:40] Speaker C: That's right. They do. And I think that stops a lot of people. Yes. Even. Even though they can just listen to the radio and hear it. It's more fun to watch it.
[00:36:48] Speaker D: It has even a more hypnotic effect to watch the numbers than does listening.
[00:36:54] Speaker C: That's right. You're probably all wondering who won this round. I forgot. I never did say, did I?
Marina Sertis is 37. Oh, my. And Jack's at 35.
And so he's now ahead of Mike Epstein.
[00:37:09] Speaker B: Send Jack home.
[00:37:11] Speaker E: You want all of us to get out of here, don't you?
[00:37:14] Speaker C: Yeah. So Jack has three and Mike too. And one apiece from Terry and Jenny.
Okay, how about Eric Idol? Do you know that name?
[00:37:24] Speaker D: Oh, yeah, from multiple flying circus.
[00:37:27] Speaker C: It's hard to stomp you guys on anything, isn't it?
[00:37:31] Speaker D: The television generation.
[00:37:33] Speaker E: We are.
[00:37:34] Speaker C: That's right. He was the star of life of Brian the Reyes. Is that the way you pronounce it? Or the rudles? R u t l e s. Do you know that name? Russell's Reytles.
[00:37:44] Speaker D: It was a spoof on the Beatles.
[00:37:46] Speaker C: Oh, I see. Splitting airs. Heirs and nuns on the run and tvs nearly departed.
He's from England, of course. Eric Idle, the actor comedian.
[00:38:04] Speaker D: What do you think, Jack from Monty Python's flying?
[00:38:17] Speaker C: Was that the imitation of Prime Minister John Major again?
[00:38:20] Speaker D: Yes, on Monty Python. Flying circus. Now, that was somewhere in the beginning of the show. And now for something completely different.
A man with three buttocks.
[00:38:33] Speaker C: He did say. Did he say three buttocks? That I did. I can't say. Right.
He is.
[00:38:44] Speaker D: He's gonna be, ooh, 55 by now.
[00:38:47] Speaker C: Okay. Because we're running.
We're running a little late, but I've just checked with Gary Lafayette, and he says he'll be willing to go on at 530 instead of five. Good. In order that we might complete this game.
[00:38:59] Speaker E: He's such a great guy.
[00:39:01] Speaker C: He's a wonderful guy, and he's willing to sell. And I'll back to the news already in progress or something like that to cover it up. Mike, what do you think about the age of Eric idol?
[00:39:15] Speaker E: I think he's 57.
[00:39:16] Speaker B: I was going to say 57.
[00:39:18] Speaker E: So go ahead, say it.
[00:39:20] Speaker B: I'll say 58.
[00:39:22] Speaker C: Terry?
[00:39:23] Speaker B: 58.
[00:39:24] Speaker C: Terry says 58. Jenny?
[00:39:26] Speaker B: 54.
[00:39:27] Speaker C: 54. Okay. As the lone ranger said to Tonto, oh, Tonto, how come Eric is just standing there? Looks like he's doing nothing.
Eric idle.
I have to get at least one tanto joke. Okay. Eric idol is 54. 53. I'm sorry. 53. However, jenny said 54, so she wins that round. Wow.
However, Jack hard wins the game because he had three. Oh, right. But Mike Epstein and Jenny are tied, and that means they go to the prom together.
[00:40:05] Speaker B: They got us. They got us.
[00:40:07] Speaker C: And I think. I think Mike, jenny, Mike is going to get you a gardenia wrist corsage, and you will look just sedashing made of dandelion. That's right. Thank you very much, everybody, for playing the game.
[00:40:20] Speaker B: Thank you.
[00:40:21] Speaker C: And thank you for help. Thank you for helping us. Missed two commercials, but what the heck? Who cares, you know? Hey, thank you very much, Jenny and Terry. I appreciate talking to both of you.
[00:40:31] Speaker B: And I appreciate it too.
[00:40:33] Speaker C: Okay, take care. Bye bye, and thank you. Take care, Jack.
[00:40:37] Speaker D: Oh, thank you.
[00:40:38] Speaker C: Take care. Okay. And you too, as always. As always, sir.
[00:40:42] Speaker A: Norm's hungarian gypsy princess grandmother. Always, always. A font of deep perspicuity and sagacity. Truly an unrivaled sage and savant. How lucky are we to have this preserved here for future generations to replay, absorbed and dissect?
Hang on, I'm getting a bit choked up.
Closing the vault and clearly leaving this world a little sillier than we found it for. Ribaldry, rusted cake pans, slightly used cat litter, ant riddles, peanut brittle, vintage jars of mayonnaise, whiskey induced noseglows. Tuning out your own show while doing said show. Wandering minds, asthma inhalers, snoring, lullabies, strenics, spring peepers, keyrings, Elle Macpherson, Jennifer Capriotti, the Kings Grant Inn, the North Shore Music Theater, Ted Knight, the English Parliament, Sophia Loren, Eric Idle, the Man with three buttocks, the Lone Ranger Tonto, the WBZ dumb birthday game scoreboard, the WBZ Gift and Bookshop, the 1020 page dumb birthday game rule book. Mike. Oh, my. Epstein. John Jack. JJ Hart. And the hungarian gypsy prince himself, Norm Nathan. I'm Tony Nesbitt.
